Wednesday, September 30, 2015
Saturday, September 26, 2015
LIFE PURPOSES
It took longer than I have expected to start writing again. Since it was traditionally to go to college right after I graduated from high school. I wasn't quite prepared, didn't have a clue what I was passionate to study; nor knew what I was compassionated to do when I stepped into the real world. The real world seems a lot scarier than I expected. I was totally unprepared. I went through life crisis. All I was able to do is continue to extend my hands out to god, and walk on what he has prepared for me. I went through ups and downs. I had trouble looking for a job so I went through the VESID program, and they hooked up with at my first unpaid internship at NYU Langone Medical Center. I was scanner intern with my first supervisory. Then, it came even harder, VESID hooked me up with my very first poor paying job at R+ W, doing inventory at MTA. I had to wake up extra early and it was a high school level paying position. I did well at the job, and the people were very nice, but I hated the job with a passion. I prayed to our father in heaven for help. I was very lucky because an human Resource counselor found me through LinkedIn and I was offered my first paying through through this temp. agency as a filing and interpreting clerk at VNS. The supervisor treated me terribly. I wasn't sure if Karma was on my back because once I was let go of the position, I was so relieved and Karma was bitch to the supervisor. He was laid off and the Department of Health was investigating on VNS for all things they did, and was not following the Department of Health's policy.
After i went back to R+W inventory to continue to earn money and at the same time, Anxious temp agency offered me another assignment with Elderserve. At Elderserve, i felt like I was very useful and capable of doing my job. I was happy and sad at the same time. I was picked on and didn't get a cubical. However,I love my job. Because of Elderserve, my first bucket of money started to grow in my bank account. Since I was working at this assignment for a year, Elderserve didn't continue to extend my contract. I wondered what I have done wrong? Then, all of a sudden, I went through depression.
I prayed to our Father in heaven again, and less than a month I was offered a position at Xincon. I was not good at this job, and after my 3 months probation, i was offered a position where i was capable of doing back at MLTC - Aetna through ACCM. Due to the distant, I turned them down. I met my loyal teammate, Tina Wu. Tina was very nice to me. She taught me a lot. Tina and I hated our pay because we had done more and get paid less. Then, I was offered again with the same position at ACCM, and still turned it down.
My health was risking my life and I'd decided to resigned the position. The Directory of People service- Marcia Parker and my manager - Anna Joa were very nice people. They were worry about me. I should have took the position at ACCM instead I took the wrong path. Anna has promoted me to a different position- Enrollment Specialist at Aetna. I couldn't handle the pressure and cried 4x within two months.
Tina has told me that to never risk my life over a job because our body is very smart and knows how to make me pay for the abuse to myself.
Now, I am jobless. I cried and decided to listen to my family, friends( Tina, and my nurses) advice. I took some time off and got away from the city and went to Lakeland, Tennessee. My aunt has introduced me to a nutritionist Health Practitioner- Heather Meeks. Healther is going to heal my body so I can stay healthy.
Due to my jobless, I gave many thoughts and ask our Father in heaven if NYC is the right environment for me. i stressed out easily. Today I took out the bible that was given to me by my aunt Sandy. I cried and read the bible at the same time.
In the bible, I was reading Matthew 6:2 25-34
'Therefore don't worry tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
" Keep asking and it will given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knowing, and the door will opened to you."
Psalm 138:7-8
If i walk into the thick of danger,you will preserve my life from the anger of my enemies. You will extend your hand; The lord will fulfill his purpose for me. Lord, your love is external, do not abandon the work of your hands.
Psalm 42: 5-6
"Put your hope in god, for I will still Praise him. I am deeply depressed"
Matthew 6:2- 25
"This is why I tell you: Don't worry about your life..."
After i went back to R+W inventory to continue to earn money and at the same time, Anxious temp agency offered me another assignment with Elderserve. At Elderserve, i felt like I was very useful and capable of doing my job. I was happy and sad at the same time. I was picked on and didn't get a cubical. However,I love my job. Because of Elderserve, my first bucket of money started to grow in my bank account. Since I was working at this assignment for a year, Elderserve didn't continue to extend my contract. I wondered what I have done wrong? Then, all of a sudden, I went through depression.
I prayed to our Father in heaven again, and less than a month I was offered a position at Xincon. I was not good at this job, and after my 3 months probation, i was offered a position where i was capable of doing back at MLTC - Aetna through ACCM. Due to the distant, I turned them down. I met my loyal teammate, Tina Wu. Tina was very nice to me. She taught me a lot. Tina and I hated our pay because we had done more and get paid less. Then, I was offered again with the same position at ACCM, and still turned it down.
My health was risking my life and I'd decided to resigned the position. The Directory of People service- Marcia Parker and my manager - Anna Joa were very nice people. They were worry about me. I should have took the position at ACCM instead I took the wrong path. Anna has promoted me to a different position- Enrollment Specialist at Aetna. I couldn't handle the pressure and cried 4x within two months.
Tina has told me that to never risk my life over a job because our body is very smart and knows how to make me pay for the abuse to myself.
Now, I am jobless. I cried and decided to listen to my family, friends( Tina, and my nurses) advice. I took some time off and got away from the city and went to Lakeland, Tennessee. My aunt has introduced me to a nutritionist Health Practitioner- Heather Meeks. Healther is going to heal my body so I can stay healthy.
Due to my jobless, I gave many thoughts and ask our Father in heaven if NYC is the right environment for me. i stressed out easily. Today I took out the bible that was given to me by my aunt Sandy. I cried and read the bible at the same time.
In the bible, I was reading Matthew 6:2 25-34
'Therefore don't worry tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
" Keep asking and it will given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knowing, and the door will opened to you."
Psalm 138:7-8
If i walk into the thick of danger,you will preserve my life from the anger of my enemies. You will extend your hand; The lord will fulfill his purpose for me. Lord, your love is external, do not abandon the work of your hands.
Psalm 42: 5-6
"Put your hope in god, for I will still Praise him. I am deeply depressed"
Matthew 6:2- 25
"This is why I tell you: Don't worry about your life..."
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